When I worked in Disney World in Florida, we were taught that we couldn’t give direct eye contact for more than 3 seconds at a time, that it was too powerful, too intense. We were then told to either look at their forehead or look away and back again.
I find eye contact to be an amazing opportunity to connect with another human being, whether that be a friend, a foe or a stranger. With it comes the invitation to share, to allow someone else into your world for that moment. Eyes are described as the windows to the soul, and I believe that when we let ourselves be seen through contact with another, we open up the curtains to our soul, so that the world is in contact with the soul. And what follows will always be powerful and intense, magical. We could all do with opening up the curtains, pulling down the blinds, cleaning the glass, opening up those beautiful windows for air. There’s no point living in the dark when the sun shines so bright outside.
I love the way eye contact is kinesthetic too, how it’s practically physical when someone catches your eye. I can’t see far away things without my glasses but I can tell when someone looks through my eyes, it’s as powerful as a pull or push, and in that moment I can see them. Yet it’s much stronger when I do have my glasses on, I find. For example at concerts; when I was at the glee concerts and one of them shared eye contact with me, it was like a shot of electricity or a firework through my body, and in that moment we’d share something, our whole life stories, the windows to our souls crystal clear. Every single time, even in a sky of eyes, they’d find mine and bam, I saw them, the real person and we connected.
Through eye contact you can convey so much, tell the other person, they’re not alone, tell them they understand, tell them you’ve been there too. Without saying a word there’s another human being you’ve touched without technically touching them.
My favourite ability with eye contact is to see people, really and truly see them, it’s an amazing effect when someone looks at you and sees you, no matter how invisible or insignificant one can feel, when someone sees you, it says, I see you, for all that you are. And that’s something pretty special.
Go out and make a difference, you may be surprised what something so small can do for another.